As a Dance Mom you are your child’s life coach. Dance moms and their children put their heart and soul into a performance and facing a loss can be tough but it doesn’t have to be. It can be a learning experience for both. Everyone wants to win but competitions aren’t just about winning the trophy, competitions are about comradely, socializing and personal growth. Here’s how you can help your child handle competition losses and turn them into something positive and help them grow as an individual.
1. Everyone Has Feelings
You and your child may feel disappointed, frustrated, or even sad after a loss, and those are completely normal feelings. It’s good to express your emotions as long as it’s in a mature way and leaving jealousy out. Acknowledge all of their hard work but remind them that not winning doesn’t mean you are a failure.
2. Keep Things Positive And In Perspective
Remind your child that every competitor, no matter how good they are, experiences losses. Even professionals have moments where they don’t win. Help them understand that one competition result does not define their talent and reflect on the day’s event for future improvement.
3. Acknowledge Their Hard Work
Competition results aren’t the only measure of success. Always praise their efforts and hard work, improvements and dedication. Point out the things they did well. Let them know their progress and positive attitude matters more than an award.
4. Teach Them About Personal Growth
A loss is an opportunity to learn. Encourage your child to see the mistakes they made. Ask questions like, “What do you think went well?” and “What can we work on for next event?” Teach them to focus on improving, self development and personal growth.
5. Process Judges’ Feedback Constructively
Judges’ comments and critiques should be used for improvement. Instead of focusing on what they didn’t like, help your child see feedback as constructive advice for the next competition. Go over the judges’ notes together and use it as a guide to make them an even stronger dancer.
6. Set New Goals Together
Use the loss as motivation to set new goals and make improvements. You will have an unbiased opinion of your strengths and weaknesses and know where you have room to improve. Setting achievable goals helps them focus on their progress.
7. Good Sportsmanship
Remind your child that how they handle a loss says a lot about their character and them as a person. Always congratulate and acknowledge their fellow dancers talents, appreciate the experience, and stay gracious. Good sportsmanship will earn them the respect of everyone.
8. Do Not Place Blame
It’s easy to blame a judge, teachers, coaches or even fellow competitors for a loss. Instead, keep a healthy attitude by focusing on where you can improve. This teaches your child accountability and builds determination.
9. Keep Things Fun
At the end of the day, dancing should be something your child loves to do. Remind them why they started dancing in the first place. Encourage them to enjoy the process, build friendships, and find pleasure in expressing themselves through dance.
10. Be a Good Example
Your reaction sets the tone for how your child will handle losses. If you stay positive, and encouraging, they’ll learn to do the same. Show them that winning isn’t everything and no one likes a sore loser.
Losses can be tough, but with the right mindset, they can become valuable learning experiences. By supporting your child through the ups and downs of dance competitions, you’re helping them develop the confidence and manners that will serve them very well in life.